HA! Made him cry like a baby today and like I said, I can't exactly feel sorry for himself. He COMPLETELY deserves EVERY bit of miserable ness he feels now. I gloat and SWIM in it.

It's not like as if I didn't give him enough warnings. It's not like I didn't drop enough hints. Like that time I said, "You know what I hate more than anything? People who LIE. People who lie absolutely kill me. Whenever anyone lies to me, I can never ever trust them again." and I launched into a conversation about my friend Thuy.

And then, there was the time where I said that if he started dating anyone, I'd move out undoubtedly.

And THEN there was the god-knows-unsubtle hint I told him this one night he went out, where I said, "You know, if you're not telling me what you're doing, you probably shouldn't be doing it."

And it's not like I haven't been a damn good daughter this whole time. I mean, lord, I've put up with SO much shit. Who else wouldn't say anything when he makes it grossly clear every night that he's sitting there jackin' off every night? Who else wouldn't say anything for at least 3 weeks when they first discover he's doing shit he ain't supposed to? Actually, fuck 3 weeks, I found out right before we went to Malaysia he was putting personals up. What kind of a fucking loser find someone online, too? Anyway I dropped hints about that, too. "People who try to get hooked up online and pathetic and deseprate."

God, I could just kill him. I'm glad I made him cry. If I had anyplace to go, another solution, if I had a car and apartment and the money, well, I'd kill him.

But I don't. SO I have to put up with THIS for another 2 years.

I MUST get good grades so I can fly to college, somewhere far. For the longest time, I kept thinking, "I must go to college nearby" but why really? What's tying me down? him? Kathy? Kathy's in LA! Who else do I care about enough to stay here? There's nobody I see every week or something. I have nothing here. I should just go. I'll apply everywhere. I'll go far, if the best college is distant. I've made up my mind. Nobody's going to ruin my future for me, nobody's going to make me change my course, nobody will predetermine anything for me but ME.