Dear TKM,

I'm sorry to hear that I must come with my father if I am to visit Europe. I'm also sorry to say that in that case I will not be able to visit you. I feel that I am an independent adult and am wanting to go on a fun vacation without parental observation but if you don't see it that way I guess I will be forced to go to Malaysia instead.

Please do not try to convince me that I need to speak to him and please do not insinuate that I am the instigator of this conflict. He is the one that actually left the house. It is illegal for me to live as a minor alone but I am. He lives with his girlfriend right now, is buying their groceries and acting as a full-time father for her 2 children, who adore him and the attention.

Again please do not suggest that I am "cutting off my own nose." The reason I have not spoken to my father in 4 months is not because of me. The reason I have not spoken to my father in 4 months is because he has not returned to my house in 4 months.

Do not pressure him to return however, I do not feel any liking towards him whatsoever and such has been for quite some time now. I enjoy having the house to myself and I feel it's good practice for the real world in just a few short months.

I have had to make all of my important decisions on my own for years now, and despite what you may think I am used to it. I am actually quite smart and capable of making those decisions without help because I have been preparing to make these decisions alone for a long, long time. I am quite certain about what to do at this point and have found adopted family in Greg and his parents who welcome me into their home during holidays and vacations.

In the end, my father is happier where he is now with his family and I am happier alone at home and with my second family and friends. This may be a hard reality to accept, TKM but you must acknowledge that not everything happens the way you want it to--but it isn't neccessarily always bad. It's true that my situation now isn't the typical ideal one with a happy family and grand functionality to it, but that doesn't necessarily need fixing--I think it's genuinely better this way and we are both much happier than we've ever been together. I've accepted my reality and I am coping with my life maturely and with ease.Things happen, but I've learned to make my life happy in spite of it all. Water can be thicker than blood and it serves me well.

If and when you decide not to try to "remedy" this situation by punishing me by forbidding me to visit France without my father and instead letting me have my vacation alone or with Greg--as is the situation with me on any given day--let me know and I will be happy to visit perhaps sometime for a couple of days in July. Give my regards to Uncle TS, say there is much love and mochi from Stephanie.

-Stephanie

P.S.
By the way, UC Santa Cruz is a very good college and if I went I would not mind spending my 4 years there. However, I may attend UC Davis if they accept me, which is also a very good college. IT experts and science experts around here are not actually in shortage, they are in full abundance and have absolutely crammed all of the computer and engineering majors so that it's impossible to get in under them. Maybe not like the rest of the US...this is the silicon valley and getting into that field is extremely competitive. In any event, I absolutely detest science and math and would be miserable for the rest of my life if I pursued those careers.

Please me assured that I will not "screw up my life" with horible life-changing decisions without his advice. I have gotten into some really nice colleges and my major would be up to me anyway; I think I will major in English.